I’ve been off the radar for a while now and for good reason. Ever so often life throws a curved ball at you, forcing you to get acquainted with the hardest reality of life. The truth that we so conveniently choose to ignore. The truth that might hit us in the  most unexpected of times. And then, you shiver…..stop…..and reflect. Will we ever be ready to face it when the time comes?

You’ve already guessed it by now….yes! DEATH!

We read about it in the news every single day but it doesn’t hit home until it is a near and dear one. So ironic of human nature. We say we care, we pretend it pains us when we watch world massacres, but never so much until it affects yourself.

We are so busied by the mundane routines of life that we neglect and ignore those precious few people in our life. Life for us millennials has become an everyday challenge. The world has expanded and been put at our fingertips. Social media connects us all and yet distances us. Not all but definitely some of us have lost the art of expressing by way of talking. We text/tweet/post better than we talk and this has surpassed the limits for the generations after us.

We are continuously stressed by our workplaces which have over the years forgotten that their employees are humans too. Living, breathing, feeling humans that have a life outside the workplace too. We come home to many other tasks including tutoring and chaperoning our kids to religious / recreational activities that are important for their character building. Very few people around you are ready to even lend a helping hand.

So around all this it requires one to sacrifice those few minutes of solace to dial the number or drive to those few family and friends that are important. Those precious few that do care about you. Those cousins, uncles, aunts and friends that were part of your life when you were little and have still hung on and care about you.

Us millennials I believe have come to that threshold of life where near and dear elders are passing on. We need to remind ourselves amidst our busy routines to reach out to them and serve them if we can, while we can. Needless to say our parents and siblings should top the list.

Those of you who do, kudos to you. A few who need to give it that extra push, keep at it. And when the time does come for a near and dear one:

  1. Shiver – let the feeling run through you. It hits hard, you shake, you quiver, but let it pass.
  2. Stop – give it a moment. Think. Pray for the deceased. Do everything you can to comfort the family and friends directly affected. If you are the one directly affected, hold on, seek support, connect to the Almighty and you will eventually bounce back.
  3. Reflect – on yourself and your life. Make a few changes if you have to, within yourself or in your life, to make yourself a better person, to set things right in your life. This will never ever make you ready, but might make it a tiny bit easier.

Allah Almighty says, “Every self will taste death. You will be paid your wages in full on the Day of Rising. Anyone who is distanced from the Fire and admitted to the Garden, has triumphed. The life of this world is only the enjoyment of delusion,” (3:185)


15 Replies to “Shiver..Stop..Reflect!”

  1. Mashallah, this is so well written, I really connected with your words, I lost two close members to me within a space of a year. It really made me reflect on life and open my eyes to what is important. Alhamdulillah


    1. Thx so much sister for your wonderful comment. I wrote this after losing a loved one and it made me get things into perspective… Alhumdulillah


  2. Mashallah! Really beautiful post. It really made me think about my outlook towards death. It is true, when I see and hear alot of news about deaths and massacres in my country or different parts of the world, I have to make myself empathetic towards them and force myself to remember the pain and gravity of death. It is only when someone close to you dies or when you’re in a near death situation that you realize what it means to be dead. I keep reminding myself of death and living my life according to it. But often I feel I’m not doing enough or forcing myself to feel the pain of others so intensely and so often that it doesn’t feel right….


  3. Such a great reminder SubhanAllah! May we all face it when Allah is pleased most with us. We totally need to reflect often and work towards betterment.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. This is a very deep and meaningful post, one of your more heartfelt writings, it articulated the feelings we have all had at the loss of someone close to us, which often don’t leave you. These events change us and while we struggle with the grief, it’s important to reflect and let it bring about an improvement in ourselves and through that to those around us.


  5. Indeed death is something we witness of others from time to time and surely it is an eye-opener for us. It’s a reminder that life is short and we must make the most of it while we can.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Death is something that we often forget that we will face. We become arrogant in our daily lives forgetting we won’t live for ever.

    I was touched with death properly in my teens when I lost my brother…then a few distant relatives passed away from cancer…and just now there is someone who is seriously ill and it looks like they may not have long left. It really does make you stop and think.


    1. May Allah (swt) bless your brother with Jannah tul Firdaus. May Allah (swt) ease the pains of all who are sick.
      Jazak Allahu Khairan sister for reading and taking out the time to comment.


  7. I lost a loved one recently and this post has rightly expressed what I am currently going thru. We always think that death is far away it’s for the old and sick but with the recent death of my cousin who was only few years older than me I have realized that death can take anyone. My family is still under shock and as you have rightly mentioned I had lost touch with my extended family members over the years, especially after I got married and moved to another country. I just feel like turning back the clock now and reconnecting with my lost dear ones. At least after this stark reminder I should do my best to keep in touch with the rest of family. Thank you for this wonderful article.


    1. Jazak Allahu khairan sister. True, somehow we always think that death will not affect us. May Allah bless us all with a long, healthy life. May death serve as a reminder to us all so that we make the most of the time we have with our loved ones.


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