Torn!

Pulled in all directions, torn between worlds, is the heart of a woman at more than few occasions. Give one more priority over the other and the other begins to complain. The balancing act is hard to master. The acrobats who do it…Salute!! For always having been poor at it, it’s still a battle to be won.

Thank heavens for understanding friends who do not add to the list. Family, spouse, siblings and lil Minions…..it’s a struggle to balance them all. Add a job/career to that and you’re walking on a tight rope.

Apparently according to a research done by a career consultant/author a staggering 70% of women struggle with their emotional wellbeing. Oops! that’s not good. It accounts for a surge in emotinal distress in women.

All this stress to meet the demands of all can at times make us trip. We trip to the point where we become those momsters/raptors shouting, screaming, yelling at every little thing. All because we are trying so hard to be that perfect acrobat who can walk that tight rope with perfection.

The heart is torn…we want to do it all. Give our folks, spouse and our little family the love and attention they need. It’s hard enough playing all the different roles, add work roles and responsibilities, and we end up sometimes with an identity crisis. More often than not we let go of one of the roles. We cut some slack on one of the roles. But, what we need to know and realise is that it is ok to do so.

I read a même once which said ‘I’m not biryani (an Indian rice dish)…I cannot satisfy everyone.’

It comes to mind now as it is entirely true. We cannot satisfy everyone, we have just got to stop and actually sit and talk with the people involved and figure out a bit of time management with all.

  1. Stop beating yourself about it. We are only human. Change your thought process. We tend to dwell on the other while giving time to one, so much so that we do not thoroughly enjoy the time spent with one.
  2. Figure out time to be spent with all. Prioritise. If you’ve had to push one down on the priority list, its A ok. Communicate that with the concerned party and things should be fine.
  3. It helps a ton to have an understanding spouse. So talk it out with them, get them involved. You’ll need all the love and understanding in this.
  4. Get the Minions involved. Talk to them. It’s ok to leave them with trusted family and friends at times. It’s even ok take a vacay by yourself. Do not beat yourself about it. Just going to your parent’s to have a couple of days of alone time in your old room, is fine!
  5. There’s always a tug of war between families. Life is about juggling and shifting priorities. Don’t go crazy with guilt. You need to give time to both. Give it to them at their different times and explain to them that if they’re nagging, it doesn’t help.
  6. Last but not least….Chill and relax! Enjoy every bit of it. Take one day at a time. Life is wonderful. Absorb every bit of love and happiness and spread it around to all those who need it.
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